The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman originally published in 1992 was a book that opened my eyes (heart) to an idea I had never considered – that different people had different ways of showing and receiving love!
My life had been filled with trauma, with “love” defined in so many dark ways that I was deeply wounded and did not even realize how I had hidden away from those wounds within my own dark room.
I not only did not know what love was, I was not capable of accepting love or of giving it to anyone else—how can you dip water from an empty bucket? My life before I read this book had destroyed all my preconceived notions of what love and life would be like for me and left me confused and stuck in a dark, empty place unable to see any way out of the dark,
BUT . . .
The idea of “love” as a way of behavior that comes from a place within
caused me to stop, look, and listen—and realize that my inner self had to
be faced and worked with if I ever hoped to give or receive love. Hatred of
myself and others would not bring me to what I needed and wanted—what
we all need and want . . . to be loved for who we are!
This journey was not easy and was filled with many discouraging times
and struggles with long-worn “acceptable” masks that were painful to
remove and scary to drop—BUT . . .
I met some people who accepted me for who I was with all my “warts” and
who encouraged me to find ways to express myself creatively and very slowly
I felt a tiny pinpoint of light in the darkness that was me and then I met my
husband who was secure within himself and was comfortable with imperfections
without judging and my journey to light from darkness began – a process of
life that never stops being an “onion journey” (peeling away layer after layer to
expose and heal) so that love could grow and overflow more every moment.
Many sages have helped me on my journey, many philosophies have guided me
and my Judeo-Christian background gave me the Life and Truth of Jesus, the
Christ, that brought me to want to live LOVE as he did . . . to step into that flow
of LIFE and Love. May Love always flow through my life as my heart continues to
heal and overflow from a bucket full of unconditional love . . . the flow of Life . . . the flow of Love!