I Wonder . . .

for several days, I have felt a simple thought
pushing me to consider how “I see” anything –
what affects how I see or hear
anything in my world . . .

since I have enjoyed graphic design for many years,
the thought became a graphic that shows how
the same image can “feel” different just by
changing one of the typestyles
and that
brought me to consider how MY filters could
make my response to something or to someone
be different at different times,
when I am in different “moods,”
just changing one thing might make
a big difference in how I see or
how I react inside myself . . .

–like when I feel fancy and dress up
or when I feel casual and dress down,
or when I want to stay in my lounging clothes,
do I respond differently?

Perhaps I should consider MY filters,
MY state of mind,
MY heart condition,
how I AM “dressed” for the day and
how does it affect how I see–
I wonder . . .

Posted in Life Helps | Leave a comment

What Does Your God Look Like?

God looks different to me than He does to you and,
in fact,
He looks a lot different to me today than He did
5 years ago or 10 years ago—
even the way He looked to me yesterday is
slightly different than He looks to me today
because every moment “stuff” happens or
I think of something differently than I did 5 minutes ago
or I hear something that makes me start thinking
about something I had never considered before that moment . . .

I’ve heard it said that we create God in our own image or,
at the very least, we assume He has characteristics
that fit some sort of a list of expectations we have in our minds.
This list seems to change over a period of time because it
draws from our experiences, examples of people we admire,
and how we internalize and respond to our daily existence—
we draw conclusions often without being consciously aware
that we are drawing conclusions—and
we incorporate these conclusions into our basic belief system
including how we view what we call “God.”

The puzzle of my life includes periods of dark traumas
mixed with periods of “blue skies” interspersed with
some periods I can’t recall very well because nothing very good
or very bad was happening to place a marker on that period.
And, so it is with my view of God—
sometimes I view Him in the “blue skies” above and
sometimes I see Him as a force against a very dark, stormy backdrop
sometimes I see Him as a part of the “structure of organized religion”
other times I see Him up in the clouds of a non-descript sky floating freely;
sometimes I think He is a very formal entity who wants my bowing down
and other times I feel He is a caring friend who is close to me;
sometimes I don’t think I can see Him at all and
sometimes I feel I can see Him clearly—and
I think that is all okay with God
as I wander on my path and wonder about God . . .
spirit seeking Spirit . . . always . . .
wait! is that a light I see just ahead . . .
does it look like . . . could it be . . . God?

Posted in Life Helps | 2 Comments

In a mixed up world . . . WHO AM I?

Posted in Life Helps | Leave a comment

Social Media and Dinosaurs

directly from Latin socialis of companionship, of allies; united, living with others

Dinosaurs likely worked AS A COMMUNITY, laying their eggs in a common nesting ground. Juveniles congregated in “schools,” while adults roamed and foraged for the herd.
RECENT experience on “social” media—
—two sites – both “openly religious” in nature
site ONE—admin promoter of “one true church” I grew up in
expresses strong opinions, often judgemental
and condemning of those who disagree
site TWO—admin encourages discussion without judgement
more accepting of others posts
discussions are varying opinions from others

—my observations
site ONE—when someone offered a different opinion, the
admin and other posters attacked, some with degrading
comments and the admin would make a meme of one of
the most scathing attacks and post it on the site as a
“new” post which basically “honored” meanness
(I have posted in the past questioning the meaning of
a post by admin and experienced very strong, negative
push back so I do not post any opinions to this site and
rarely even look at its posts – it is very obvious that they
are not interested in “discussion” but only in declaring
their “opinions” as the ONLY “truth”)
site TWO—when someone offered a different opinion, the
responses were mostly offering ideas about other ways
of looking at the content of the original post and I did not
see any harsh judgements during exchanges of thoughts
even though some were stronger in their wording of
their opinions – but no name calling or demeaning words
(I have posted an opinion to this site and did not feel
“attacked” when someone disagreed with my opinion
and, when I further clarified my thoughts, I felt that others
on this site were okay with not making ONE perspective
the ONLY perspective but allowed disagreement without judgement)

The dinosaurs that lived in community seemed to last longer than those who did not—
repeatedly, nature shows us that living in community and working together for the common good is the better choice.
—may each of us work to make “social media” truly “SOCIAL“
consider BEFORE interacting or reacting on social media:
• posting as allies against challenges not against each other;
• united to make the world better for all not just me or my group,
• building community to live peacefully with others so

Posted in Life Helps | 1 Comment

Me, You, Us – a Challenge

a “challenge” meaning: from the 1570s, “having been called to a contest”

For the month of January 2023, a group of bloggers chose to participate in a “challenge” to post every day in the month to a daily prompt. I was one of those bloggers and there were some who had participated before who knew what to expect—I did not know what was coming, but it sounded interesting. I wrote for the first day, but the second and third day were prompts that I did not feel able to write about, so I did not (my record was 29 days completed out of 31).

This challenge caused me to stop and consider a much more difficult “prompt”—how do I show up daily in my world, a world that seems so cold and obviously fractured—people not working together in most ways and some very combative.

The January blog challenge showed me that a very diverse group of people could exchange thoughts, opinions, ideas, pain, joy, and pieces of their life story without becoming hateful or insulting or judgemental. There were different belief systems represented, different occupations, different lifestyles, different countries, different cultures, different ages . . . and yet, as I read the different posts and the comments made by others on those posts, I was struck by a non-combative tone by people who were only connected through their blogs and, as “strangers” could have felt free to express some degree of “negative feedback” as some pretty strong posts were shared, but I did not see any of that—rather I saw most often expressions of care and concern for those revealing struggles with many different challenges, voices of comfort and encouragement.

WHY was this “world” different than the one I see every day?
I think, perhaps, some would say that participants chose to participate or not
and that is true and the “prompts” guided the focus of the posts which could be accepted or not, each person’s choice, and each person would choose to read or not read the posts of others.
However, would that not also be true in the world we live in?
• I can choose to participate or not in the daily challenge of facing the day
• I can choose to accept or reject the “prompts”: the loud voices, the news, the gossip, the rumors—what guides my focus
• I can choose to “read” or listen to what others are putting out or I can filter the overwhelming chaos and noise according to my values
• I can choose my response—what will I post on the wall of my heart/mind and what will I share with others

Me, You, Us – the challenge is real, but each of us has the option to come daily to the challenge . . . our lives are our daily “post” to the world we live in—what am I choosing to “post” today? Me, You, Us . . . increasing the fractures or focusing on the tiny points of light coming through the cracks—I choose . . .

Posted in Life Helps | 3 Comments

Sunsets – the Sun is Always Shining

A sunset, also known as sundown, is the daily disappearance of the Sun below the horizon due to Earth’s rotation (sundown – sun going down).
As the sun disappears below the horizon there is twilight, dusk, and then the darkness of night.

BUT the sun never stops shining, it just stops being where I can see it.
No matter how dark it looks or how stormy the sky is, the sun is still shining just like it always does . . . I just cannot see it because of darkness or a storm or because I  have my eyes closed.

The light is always there—always!
Perhaps, there is a life lesson in this for me . . .
perhaps . . .

tag: bloganuary

Posted in Bloganuary 2023 | Leave a comment

Chapters of Life – Searching for the Light

Book One
Writing a book has been in my thoughts for many years and I have actually started a number of books, but have never finished any to this point.

My main motivation for starting a book was to explore traumas in the hope that it might help someone else who was going through dark times to have hope that they, too, could survive and come out on the other side of the pain. However, I soon discovered that writing those stories would mean I would have to experience them again, re-live the trauma.

Like talking with a therapist, I began “talking” to the page in front of me while calling the past to mind and trying to honestly recount the event and my feelings, exploring my part in each trauma and trying to understand the reasons anyone else involved might have been involved and why they might have done what they did—not in an attempt to assign guilt, but in an attempt to understand.

It became clear that this process overwhelmed me very quickly and each time I reached that emotional overload, I would stop writing that book. What also became clear was that I made a little more progress each time I started “another book.” So, the process was working to help me very slowly release some of the darkness embedded with each trauma—almost imperceptibly, I was healing and, over the years I have released many of the harmful feelings associated with those traumas—all because of writing.

Sharing with others and finding some who care about that pain, those wounds and how the trauma played out in other choices shines a light on the “cycles” of wounding and healing and I say—every blog written is a part of the writer’s autobiography and provides a way to process through to healing . . . so, write on . . . right on!

tag: bloganuary

Posted in Bloganuary 2023 | Leave a comment

Learning – a moment by moment process

Over time, I have continued to learn
• that learning is a moment by moment process and
• that learning can come from my choosing to study something or
• that learning can come from life experiences in my life or in the life of another I observe and
• that learning can be a quick, short “aha” moment or a long-term, slowly unfolding series of moments

listen – look – ponder
A part of the meaning of the base word “learn’ is the idea of learning being “to follow or to find the track,” (https://www.etymonline.com/search?q=learn) and that fits with the idea that some of us are looking for meaning in our lives, a purpose for our “life experiences,” a way to see ahead on our path so—learning helps each of us “to follow or find the track” if we look, listen, and ponder.

While learning has sometimes come through painful experiences for me, it has brought me to understand more about my path which, of course, brings me some inner calm and plants that little seed of hope that I will come to more insights over the time ahead.

Bottom line: what I have learned recently . . .
I am reminded every day—
that I have much more to learn to “follow the track” I want to follow and that means I need to
listen —> look —> ponder
breathe life in slowly . . .
and learn moment by moment . . .
tag: bloganuary

Posted in Bloganuary 2023 | Leave a comment

my “PERFECT” birthday cake

a cake with just the right amount of sweetness
topped with buttercream icing . . .
I savor each bite of this wonderful creation!

One year (2014), I made an Italian cream cake for the birthday of my boss at the office I worked in who also appreciated the fine
flavor combination of an Italian cream cake . . .
the challenging part was my stove had just stopped working and would have to be replaced so I had to cook the layers of my cake in a small toaster oven, one layer at a time.
The three-layer cake turned out tasting pretty good, according to our office staff, and,
though I have made this cake several times for myself,
I always remember that cake that I think tasted better than
any other one I made – perhaps because of the time and
energy involved . . .
anything made with thought and care for someone else
always seems to be better
so this obvously imperfect cake was

and every year, I enjoy
an Italian cream cake for my birthday . . .
some I bake, some from a restaurant,
always so good – but never as perfect as that one
tag: bloganuary

Posted in Bloganuary 2023 | 3 Comments

procrastination . . . under construction


Posted in Bloganuary 2023 | 4 Comments